Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Breastfeeding journey: the sad story

What I'm about tell you all today was the most sad day of my life..

It was on a fine Sunday morning (last week). I was postcall. The long Saturday at work I had the day prior, made me couldn't wait to go back to my family as soon as I finished my shift. Who likes working on a weekend right?..and to come home to my little one, is a thing to look forward to daily.

Reached home, had for awhile. Then I unpacked my cooler bag to keep my EBM that I managed to pump during the busy oncall.

Went to my deep freezer and found that the door was not properly closed!!..I HAD THE SHOCK OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!...

All cair ;(

All my EBM..the hardwork throughout the past 3 months gone down the drain when all my EBM got thawed!!!!...

I wasn't aware that I couldn't refreeze thawed milk even though it is still cold. I sought advices from people in FB, and most of them said even a partially thawed milk cannot be refreezed..but some said the one that has crystal ice, can.

Can you feel what I felt mommies??...I was just so jaw dropped..and minutes after I found myself doing Adele: i'm rolling in the deeeeeeeeeeep...CRYING!!!!...

About 40 plastic bags and bottles full with EBM got wasted. I asked my husband to throw it cause it was just killing me :(.

Worried of couldn't continue supplying EBM for my baby, I felt like closing one eye and refreeze the ones that were partially thawed. Until my husband said that he wouldn't risk our son just because I wanted to exclusively breastfed him, I realised that I had acted foolishly.. Am I out of my mind???..felt so stupid!

Ready to be thrown

Since I started working, my milk production has gone down.. Normally I was able to express almost 12oz in 15 I only managed to get only half of my current state, I couldn't cope with 'pump harini, for supply hari esok' cos I wouldn't be able to do son dah start minum banyak..and there are times he can finish 7oz in one go.. :(

After checking all the EBM, I only managed to save around 15 packets/bottles.. for that I felt grateful, but couldn't help myself from getting stressed up knowing that I had to double my effort from now onwards..

After the incidence, I was in a very stress mode for the next 2-3 days.. Husband kept reminding me that it was not worth it and it would only jeopardise my milk production further.

Husband bought a latch to make sure it won't happen again... I recommend for those who are planning to buy a deep-freeze, beli the ones yang bukaan pintu di bahagian atas..bukan tepi..

 I've started taking Maxolon ever since. Malas nak makan-makan supplement that claimed to boost up milk production. I never like supplements, I'm just plain lazy. So Maxolon would be a better choice, telan for 2 weeks je. Alhamdulillah after 2 days of Maxolon, I can see the difference, and Alhamdulillah, I can feel that it's getting back to normal.

ALLAH maha berkuasa. Dia boleh tarik rezeki kita bila-bila masa yang di-kehendakiNya. Kalau bukan dari segi harta, atau nyawa, EBM pon boleh. I should be more grateful now...insaf...insaf...

I'm sure all mommies out there understand how I feel, and..yes..breastfeeding is such a big deal for me..

And for you sayang, mommy will try hard to give you the best... I love you

Monday, October 8, 2012

Confinement and tukang urut

I got few emails asking about my confinement experience..and urut services. Nothing extraordinary pon so I didn't plan to blog..

To tell you the truth, I did not follow a proper confinement or pantang as we all like to call it.. I couldn't be bothered to follow cos it's killing meeee!!

Wearing socks in the scorching heat of a typical Malaysia afternoon??..unless if I felt cold then I'll to please everybody, I wear slippers instead of socks.

No aircond cos baby tak tahan sejuk??..lagi la I cannot tahan.. Suddenly when the baby first reach home after being discharged from the hospital dia tak tahan sejuk is it??..sedangkan hospital satu building aircond..even NICU pon ber-aircond. First night at home, me and husband quietly turn on the aircond when everyone fast asleep..Alhamdulillah, my baby can tahan until now..hehe..we all ni tido dah la pasang aircond, kipas pon we leave it on..baru sedap tido..but I'll make sure my baby is fully covered..

Cannot drink ice water??..3rd day of pantang, my husband curi-curi gave me Pepsi..heaven!!!!..I won't drink air with ice, asal kan a bit sejuk, I'm the same time, I'll drink air suam biasa about 2-3L per day. Milk production memang superb and I felt well mom awal-awal bising, sampai kan dia dah penat nasihat, then dia biarkan je..hehe.. Tapi depan MIL I tak

Pantang cannot go out??..first week pantang I was off to the Curve. Bukan jalan saja-saja but I had to go Mothercare to buy nursing bra. Nobody told me I needed a nursing bra before, so kira emergency Second and 3rd week dah pg KLCC..I will go out if I'm bored and needed to buy stuff, tapi sebenarnya banyak jalan will make you feel tired during pantang, I prefer to stay home.

Food?..awal-awal je berjaga. My mother getting tired of me asking can I makan this? Or that? And why I cannot makan this and that?..haha..but dia pon bukanla strict sangat, she let me eat but in a small portion. But I memang requested sup sayur sawi and ikan/ayam everyday cos it suits my taste bud..nasi lemak pon I makan during pantang!

But in terms of food I can understand why the elderly ask to pantang.. Cos they don't want babies to get colic. Alhamdulillah after one episode of bad colic that my son had (I've blogged about it last month), he never experienced gripe water, no tuam2 or anything..Alhamdulillah..tapi I still tak jaga my food pon.. Infact during pantang, once in 2 week I had McD. Bulan Ramadhan kan, easier for my husband to go through drive-thru je.

Well..kesimpulannya, I'm a very stubborn daughter..haha. Even my sister pon nagged at me for not pantang properly.. People said, it's better to pantang cos kesannya you akan rasa bila dah tua nanti. Orang tua-tua cakap, bersalin ni putus urat seribu dalam badan..sbb tu orang tua-tua selalu complaint angin-angin satu badan..hehe. Takut jugak I dengar, tak pe la. I plan to exercise pon everyday and plan to bring my son for classes at FitForTwo, hopefully it helps.

In terms of confinement lady, I did not have one cos my mom took care of me and she did a splendid job. In return, I bought her a Coach bag..I know she didn't expect anything in return, but I feel like expressing my gratitude to her. She love the bag as much as I do!..nanti boleh pinjam ye ibu..haha.

Hmm..I also drank Gamat Gamogem cos MIL suruh.. Hehe. But I know Gamat has been proven to help in healing process. So minum je la..

For urut services, I took a package from Tanamera PostNatal care services. It covers urut, tungku, and body scrub. I took for 5 days..3 days during the first week of pantang..another 2 as penutup. In between, I hired this Indonesian lady who is well known around Damansara area and a few VIPs.

Tanamera urut lady was good. If you want like a spa-type of massages, you can try it. While this Indon lady, she's good in urut as in she help to reduce muscle soreness. She even helped me with bengkak susu. Tapi bila part dia nak urut for 'naik kan peranakan', @!£@%#...sakit gila!!

Since I didn't take any jamu, she persuaded me to try hers. Few of my friends tried it before and they said it helped to increase their milk supply. I was convinced to try hers cos her almost 10th decade old mother who is in Indonesia made it herself, and it doesn't have preservative, so you need to keep it in a fridge. A bit mahal, for about 10 days it cost me RM80. I didnt experienced any hot flushes or anything, and my baby didn't get any jaundice/colic, Alhamdulillah..the smell pon very nice, coffea-scented. For massages, I paid her about RM80 per session, and had her for a week..cheaper than Tanamera, which cost about RM180 per session.

Well..urut-urut ni memang sedap, but after a while, I get bored. It's time consuming. Lama-lama tu I jadi malas. Sometimes while tengah urut my baby lapar, then kena stop to nurse him. Plus, I have to wake up early cos the urut lady will come about 10am everyday.. So yeah, 10 is a bit early for me..haha..

I'm not saying that pantang is not good..I think the elderly practiced it decades ago cos they want to help mothers to loose weight faster (by eating non-oily food), prevent babies to get colic, or prevent any allergy so it won't cause itchiness to the scar, and to help hasten the healing process.

Pantang or not, as long as the mother and baby is healthy, should be ok. What a mother who just gave birth need is good nutritious food and enough rest so she can enjoy her baby. Do what you think is right for..and what is comfortable for you.

What say you? :)

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