This entry gonna be pretty long as I went thru 31hrs of labour but I will try to shorten it. The time to see my baby come to this world was the longest I had to wait in my life. I delivered when I was 40 weeks and 5 days of pregnancy...1 cm.. so near yet so far..and so the story goes...
5th July 2012
- Confirmed it was a birth show. YAYY!!!...of cos I was excited knowing that I was post date and getting stressed up every minute of the day waiting for D(elivery)-day
- No contraction so far, so no need to go hospital...
- SMSed my husband..we both got pretty excited and laugh!!..main msg2 lagi..usually he is not like this as he will be busy in the clinic
Note: having a birth show without regular contraction doesn't mean that you're in labour..birth show is just a SIGN of early labour
- Started to have mild irregular squeezes, but still able to do things to get me distracted
- My mom and MIL got to know that I had birth show (thanks to my sister!), they persuaded me to go hospital and tell me how dangerous it is to wait at home etc..etc... (see..that's the reason I refused to tell them)
- Surges became more regular...at this time I knew that I'm already in labour
- No leaking and baby moving actively..so need not to worry, I can still wait at home
- Makan macam biasa..had KFC :)
- Couldn't sleep throughout the night...excited, nervous, had a mixed feeling..and I was too focusing on the surges
6th July 2012
- Surges became more intense and regular, every once in 5 minutes
- This time around, I knew that I had to go to the hospital
- Woke my hubby and my mom, got myself ready and off we go
- Bawak barang to the hospital mcm nak pindah rumah...haha. Sian my husband..mana tak nya, semua I nak angkut..my own pillow pon I nak bawak cos I wanna be as comfortable as I can (Thank God I brought it cos the hospital pillow tak best)
|My sleepy face|
- Arrived at Pantai Medical Centre, Bangsar
- The nurse did VE (hate it!..), I was 4cm dilated...Alhamdulillah
- Still couldn't sleep...
|Had to fill up menu form at wee hours..irritating jugak la..hehe|
- MIL arrived..she was there from the beginning until my lil' miracle arrived, Thank you mama!
- Ambulating around..sitting on a sofa, roll on my birth ball, and walk around the room and to and fro the toilet..byk kali buang air besar, no need ravin enema :)
- Dr Choong came, revised VE..(surprisingly dia buat lagi comfortable compared to the nurse)
- I was 8cm dilated. ALHAMDULILLAH, that was pretty fast, at least that was my husband and I thought...
- Seeing that I opened up fast, Dr Choong predicted that I would give birth around noon...that was a good thing to hear
- Had food in between...breakfast, Starbucks choc chip frap, dates, air zam2 and air Yassin
- The nurses get the birth pool ready..I couldn't wait to jump in.. :)
- Jumped in the birth pool with my husband *sorry no pictures as my husband didn't allow me to put it up
- It was so comforting in the water even the surges got very intense
- In between the surges me and husband laugh, he throw up some jokes, we hug, and we kissed..water really helped in controlling the pain
- Tried to doze but tak boleh, surges came very-very frequent
- While we were in the pool, MIL suapkan we all makan..how nice. I took light meals in between..tak lalu nak makan berat2..surges came like once in every 2-3minutes
- My mom arrived to give support
|Updating all family members..especially my father who work in Labuan|
- after 9 hours in the pool, I became famished, and tired, and started to get demotivated
- Dr Choong came, and repeat the VE upon my request
- I was only 9cm dilated..and the station is still high (station referred to the position of the baby's head in relative to your pelvic bone)
Whatttttt????!!!!...9 freaking hours in the pool, and I was only 1 cm progressed...
Macam tak percaya..despite the regular STRONG surges, rasa mcm nak berak during each surges, I was only 9cm...
I cried at this point of time...it is still way to far to see my baby...I feel tak sabar sangat to hug and kiss my baby up to the point that I feel like asking Dr Choong to cut open and bring him out...
MOMMY COULDN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU SAYANG!!! :(
- leg cramps, heartburn, started to sets in..DANG..had to ask for Gaviscon
- after discussion with Dr Choong, he came out with 2 plans, one is to wait in the pool, (maybe for another 4 hours which he could not promise anything, he has no issue at all with option no 1, considering that baby's heart rate is fine all the way despite me being tense up) or to get out from the pool, take epidural, and rest for few hours (which is still possible for me to birth vaginally)
Discussed with my husband, he said I needed to rest cos it's still a long way to go :(
I started to cry..
Then I cried...and cried...and cried..
I cried because I felt tired...
I cried because I have gone through this far and finally I succumbed to epidural..
I cried because I felt that I'm weak...
I cried because I'm not strong enough for my baby...
I cried because I have made everybody waited for so long..my mom, MIL, and husband was in the LR with me all the time
I cried even more when Kak Yat came to give me support :(
- The anaesthetist came to do the procedure (he poked me more than 4 times!)..arghh..sakit!
- Told Dr Choong that I refused augmentation and catheter insertion even on epidural
- I was so tired that I fell asleep during the long procedure and woke up by the strong surges
- after the drugs effect sets in, I ate a plate of rice..licin and went to sleep
- My sister came to visit, gave me support an air selusuh, and finally she went back together with my mom. Leaving me with husband and MIL
- unfortunately after awhile I could still feel the pain despite on epidural, ended up not getting enough rest
- Madam Soo Wai Han, my HB sifu, came to help me out. She never lost her faith on me..I was so touched :(
- I was half paralysed, I could not move both of my lower limbs. Regretted taking epidural!
- Wai Han helped to calm me down, helped me to breathe out my baby, whispering some birth affirmation and at the same time husband never left my side
|Wai Han did some light massages, lift up my leg, to help reposition the baby and to help baby to descend|
- I started to shiver and had a low grade fever
- My waterbag broke spontaneously...it was clear liquor. I cried again knowing that I wont get en caul birth :(
- She stayed until 1am, before she left she hypnotised me with her calm and soothing voice. Finally I went into deep sleep, and I couldn't remember anything.
|Wai Han whispered something in my ears..and I went into deep sleep. When I woke up, I feel so energezied!|
- Finally, I was fully dilated, unfortunately baby head was still high up
7th July 2012
- Baby's heart rate suddenly went up
- Dr Choong came in and he explained that intervention needed to set, too risky
- I succumbed
- As much as I wanted a gentle birth for the baby, I took everything in a positive side and kept praying to Allah..
- After almost an hour of pushing, there was still no sign that baby will come out :(
- Nurses said my technique was good, my energy still strong, somehow the head didn't descend
- Dr Choong finally decided for a vacuum delivery..Pasrah je la..dengan syarat, no episiotomy. He agreed.
- Finally..my miracle is out.
He looked calm and active, I immediately asked him why he didn't want to come out to see me!!!..hehe
Looking back at how my birth journey went, it was never actually what I wanted. What I wished for, What I've planned... All was not how I envisioned it. However, I took it with an open mind as I always keep at the back of my mind, reminding myself over and over again during pregnancy, that anything can go wrong.
Alhamdulillah that I was 'safe' from getting myself into caesarean, alhamdulillah that my baby is healthy and perfect physically (and heavy 3.6kg!). What matters is he immediately latch on me..it was a major reason why epidural was never my option as I scared that complication may arise and breastfeeding would be delay.
|We had immediate skin-to-skin contact..few minutes after, he began to search for my nipple..he did it himself!! Alhamdulillah|
ABOVE ALL.. Alhamdulillah that I've chosen the right Obstetrician, Dr Choong, who always believe in natural and gentle birthing, and understands why I chose and make the decisions that I have made throughout the labour process.
If it wasn't because the knowledge that I have gained through hypnobirthing course, if it wasn't because of Dr Choong, or I chose some other ObGyn who is not pro-natural birthing and "scalpel"-happy...hehe.. I believe I would ended up having caesarean.